Creating Calm with Jacquelyn

September 4, 201700KonMari Method, KonMari With Kids, Simplicity ParentingTags: chakras, declutter, Joy, KonMari, KonMari Method, konMari with kids, life-changing magic, Marie Kondo, Mothering, organize, personal development, root chakra, Simplicity Parenting, Spark Joy, The life-changing Magic of Tidying up, Wellbeing September 17

Recently, I had the pleasure of supporting Jacquelyn Krieger, the founder of ChakWave, in a Creating Calm session. We cleared the clutter in her daughters’ room using the principles of KonMari (the Japanese art of decluttering) and Simplicity Parenting (the art of parenting simply). We worked together to create a simplified space for her girls to play joyfully and then easily clean up. As Jacquelyn and I sipped our Gratitude tea she brightly exclaimed, “This is fun!”

Choosing Joy

It is important to begin a Creating Calm decluttering session by getting clear on your vision for your home. Once that is clear, the next step is to get quiet and tune into what “sparks joy.” Keep in mind your child’s preferences based on observing their play and knowing them. When your kids are too young to participate you will do the process without them. There is no need to worry about your choices, you can relax and trust your instincts. I recommend that my clients keep the discards in a secret spot in case there is something specific the child asks for. Believe me, the children will come home overjoyed to be able to find what they are looking for. Usually they even feel like they are discovering new toys in their cleared space!

A place for everything and everything in its place. With plenty of space for creativity.

Jacquelyn described the session as “a very root chakra/grounding experience that helps people’s life foundations be in a sturdier, healthier place.” In case you are unfamiliar with chakras this is how Jacquelyn describes them on her website,

A chakra is a vortex of constantly moving energy. Imagine subtle energies glowing and rotating like gears or becoming blocked and stagnant dependent on our physical, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing. In Sanskrit, the classical language of India, chakra literally means “wheel.” While there may be thousands of chakras in a body, for simplicity’s sake seven primary chakras are usually focused on. They are often depicted as spinning wheels of light forming a ladder from the base of the spine to the top of the head.

The root chakra specifically is the first chakra which is located at the base of the spine. This chakra establishes deep connections with your physical body, your environment and with the Earth.

When we get quiet and make choices of what to keep – and what to let go – based on trust rather than fear, we get grounded and heal our root chakra. When we connect to our environment we grounded and heal our root chakra. When we move from focusing on material abundance to inner abundance we get grounded and heal our root chakra. This is the kind of healing many of us are craving. It may be intimidating to start the simplifying process in your home, but there are ways to make it enjoyable. The clear spaces and more joyful, easeful life are well worth the effort.

Spring Clearing

April 11, 201710KonMari Method, KonMari With KidsTags: declutter, Joy, KonMari, KonMari Method, konMari with kids, Marie Kondo, Mothering, personal development, Simplicity Parenting, Spark Joy April 17

Spring is here! It’s been a wet winter here in Northern Califorina, which was exactly what we needed and now we’re ready for some sun. Spring is a great time to get energized to clear and clean your home. In my community we are about to have a “swap” where some amazing mamas organize a day when we can bring all the stuff that we are ready to pass on, and perhaps find stuff that brings us joy. At the end of the day everything left is donated. I’ve been asked to share some tips for de-cluttering, and thought it would be a great resource for people beyond my local community.

Low Hanging Fruit

First things first, get a garbage bag and a box and go through each room of your house and the garage looking for the obvious things that are no longer serving your family or are garbage. This would be a fairly quick pass through with the idea of finding the stuff that you know you are ready to let go. You might find that this is enough.

Clear by Category

Now if you want to get serious about clearing the clutter, you’ll need to collect categories of it (or subcategories if you’re a busy mom). This free checklist will guide you. I suggest checking out the Kids section of the checklist; focusing on kids clothing and toys since they grow and develop so rapidly will serve you well. Small doable steps are a great approach to adapting the KonMari method for a mom. I love how Kendra (a local mom) describes her de-cluttering process:

I like to pick an easy category to start with – I konmari’d my little one’s pants. I threw them all on the floor, pulled out our favorites and then it became really obvious which of the ones that were left didn’t make the cut for us anymore, then (this is the hardest part for me) I actually got the keepers all back in the drawer. Voila! Now her pants drawer is freshly organized with cute little folded pants, I have a bunch to give away and I feel great!

Edit Ruthlessly

If you’re attempting to fully de-clutter, be ruthless. Don’t keep too much stuff, because you’ll just have to go through the categories again and again. That is a waste of your time. Being honest with yourself the first time through might pull at your heart strings, but it is well worth the time (and discomfort!). To help you edit, ask yourself these questions as you go through your stuff:

Is it necessary?

Does it bring me joy? (Does it give me a positive feeling? Or does it give me a negative feeling?)

Having less stuff means less dealing with stuff. Less stuff helps you align with your values. Less stuff means more time connecting with your family and friends.

Letting Go

The more you focus on what you are grateful for, the more joy you will feel. Marie Kondo’s suggestion to actually say “Thank you” to your things as you let them go helps you maintain your attitude of gratitude. If talking to your things seems weird, you can say it in your mind, or find a way to remember how grateful you are. This act of gratitude can alleviate the momentary guilt you may feel about letting go.

Homes for Everything

Once you have gone through all your belongings, it’s storage time. Make sure each thing has a specific and permanent home. Creating homes for everything takes time; these strategies can help. Use the magical folding method for cloth. Place books and paper vertically. Store related items together i.e. like with like. Divide storage into squares by using boxes or trays.

Return Things to their Homes

After you use something, put it back where you got it from- right away, every time. Sounds easy enough, but it takes practice. If you forget, gently remind yourself and your family. Make sure the home for each thing is simple and clear. With practice you’ll figure it out.

Control the In-flow

Once you’ve spent the time and effort developing your “joy meter” and de-cluttering your home, you don’t want to bring a lot back in. Bring your “joy meter” with you when you go shopping (or to the swap). Trust that feeling and don’t try to convince yourself otherwise. Now that you understand what things are necessary, and what things bring you joy, use that wisdom. If you stay true to your joy, you wont have much for Spring Clearing next year.

Join a Challenge Group On Facebook

We learn best in community. Facebook is a great place to find your tribe. Especially these days there are lots of groups dedicated to KonMari or Minimalism. If you are looking for a KonMari with kids challenge group join our community!

Find Your Motivation

August 3, 201600Featured news, KonMari Method, Motivation, Self careTags: KonMari Method, meditation, Mothering, motivation, personal development, Self care, Self-Compassion, Tidying, Wellbeing, wellness August 16

I’ve been staring at a blank page for over a month trying to write about finding your motivation. The irony is that my motivation took a dive after researching how people stay motivated for my Simplicity & Joy Course. What I found really shook me up. It turns out that motivation is really about self care. Now that I’m a mom I don’t feel like I have time for much in the way of self care, and moms need it the most. What I found out, and what I realized, is that to create a joyful life we must care for ourselves first.

My plan for the workshop was to have a list of all the things people can do to stay motivated to complete their home tidying project. My initial list included practical actions such as: create deadlines; use a checklist; help others; remember why you started; schedule swaps/yard sales or donation pick ups, etc. After completing it, I had the sense that something was missing. There was some key element, some catalyst that was not there. So I decided to dig a little deeper. I came across a list that, as it’s final entry, had a phrase that struck me: practice extreme self care.

This phrase really made me think. I started to notice how rarely my cup is full enough to give as much as I do. So I decided to act: instead of writing about motivation, I focused on taking care of myself.

For example, I’m finally going to cash in the gift card for a facial that my husband got for me for Mother’s Day. Up until now, I’ve felt too busy to use it. But no more- I’m going to take care of myself, too.

The things we do to take care of ourselves don’t need to be extravagant. They can be small and simple. The other day I was preparing food for my daughter’s summer camp lunch. While I carefully sliced the apples and put cinnamon on them I thought: “how lovely it would be to be so well cared for.” So instead of just taking the other half of the apple to work with me unsliced and not cinnamon adorned, I cut it up for myself and added the sprinkles of cinnamon. Such a small gesture of self care felt lovely.

But even these things are not enough. Self care, at it’s core, is about healing our hearts. And to do this, I’m going to the local Hand in Hand parenting support group. At this group parents take turns completely listening to each other talk about the joy, hardships and heartaches we are facing. It is not easy to do – we deeply feel and express our emotions – but it is powerful medicine. I come home to my family more capable of being the mother and wife that I want to be- calmer, kinder, patient and a little more playful. The group meets weekly and if I miss a gathering I really miss it!

So with this in mind, I decided to create a new list. This list is designed to build the foundation of your motivation. It will serve not only to get you going, but to sustain you – to keep you motivated to reach your highest potential.

Self Care for Motivation

Sleep – I know it’s hard, especially with young ones, but when you have enough sleep you have energy and can function. Your overall health depends on having enough sleep. Everything in life is better when you feel rested. Do whatever it takes to get enough rest.

Meditation supports a sense of well-being in many ways. It can help you to let go of negative emotions and positively transform your dysfunctional thinking- making space for a joyful mind! Find a meditation style that you are comfortable with and meditate daily.

Nature – Take time to get outside and into nature. The fresh air, the green and blue, and the pure beauty of the earth helps put things into perspective.

Connection with others makes life meaningful. The more connected you feel, the happier you are. Meet a friend for tea or make that phone call you’ve been meaning to make. Reach out to your people and feel the love.

Support – Knowing you are not alone, that you are loved gives you strength to move through the joys and heartaches of life. Find a support group online or in person. Notice the people who lift your spirits and hang out with them more.

Emotional release heals your heart. So you can heal the world. Find what moves you- a tear jerker movie (Steel Magnolias always gets me), a therapist, a support group. Let the tears flow.

Play helps you lighten up and be in the moment- to let go in the best way possible. There are a million ways to play. Dancing is one of my favorites- I’ve been loving the Michael Franti station on Pandora lately- great positive vibes!

When my husband wants to go mountain biking or mushroom hunting, I do whatever I can to make it happen because I know when he has taken care of himself he is way more awesome to hang out with-he is happier and healthier, and that affects everyone around him. I can see that clearly with him and I feel it for myself, but am still working on letting go of my own blocks around taking time for myself. Note to self: Stop feeling guilty for making time for you. It helps to know that my daughter is watching and learning from my actions. I’d like for her to see me taking care of myself (and being way more awesome to hang out with, too)- so she’ll know how it’s done.

Behind the Scenes of “Tidy up with KonMari”

May 17, 201600Featured news, KonMari MethodTags: KonMari, KonMari Method, life-changing magic, Marie Kondo, Spark Joy, The life-changing Magic of Tidying up, Tidy up with KonMari, Tidying May 16

When Gina Lambie Kruger announced my Facebook group that she was going to have Marie Kondo film the KonMari process in her home, I knew I had to be there. Luckily, Gina is the friendliest person ever and was happy to have me, especially since she had a lot of work to do behind the scenes! I can’t believe I flew across the country (SFO to NYC) for this. Before reading her book and doing the KonMari Method in my home, I wouldn’t have considered such an adventure. It’s a good illustration of how much personal transformation is possible thanks to Marie Kondo’s book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. Leaving my daughter and husband behind was the hardest part. The rest was exciting, educational and fun! I was glad to have a big adventure and lend a helping hand.

Good morning NYC!

We had lots of work to do in order to prepare for Marie Kondo’s next tidying session with Gina. To keep track of it all we used the Checklist I designed for busy moms.

Of course there was plenty of folding involved. Following Marie Kondo’s advice for getting older children involved by folding their clothing, Gina instructs her son on the folding technique.

He’s a pro at the KonMari fold!

Next up: Sock Mountain!

We sorted out the joy and folded the kids socks. Then we had KonMari Consultant, Keiko give us a lesson on sock folding and storing. It’s not about one exact way of folding, it depends on the container you are using for storage. Keiko first tried folding the socks in half, but then decided they needed to be folded in thirds. Like Gina mentions in the show, the folding doesn’t have to be one specific way – it can be “your way also”.

Here’s a big folding surprise:

Marie Kondo chose to hang Gina’s Jeans up in the closet. Here is quite literally a KonMari’d closet.

My only claim to fame on the show was the brief moment you see the shoe racks in the closet: yes I put them together.

The Queen of Tidy is on the scene. She is perfectly perfect.

That day they filmed the tidying lessons of books and papers. Here are some of the tips straight from Marie Kondo:

When doing the book category yearbooks would be considered sentimental.
Catalogs that you read like a book can be included in the book category.
Cookbooks can be stored in the kitchen while other books are stored in a book shelf.
Books should be stored vertically and by category.
For paper, she suggests keeping only the essential ones – its less about joy and more about need.
One should think of the reasons for why you keep each paper.
It is best if each family member has a separate file for their papers.
Store actionable papers vertically, so you will be more likely to take action.

In Brooklyn it is easy to find new, joyful homes for books. Around the corner from Gina’s house is a mini library. We brought her discarded books to it and they were gone almost before we could add them to the collection!

After a lunch break, which was delicious New York style ricotta pizza, of course. Then there was more work to be done. A house doesn’t KonMari itself ya know!

It was a true pleasure to get to know Gina and her family, to help her with the tidying process, to see New York and visit some of my friends. What a gift be so inspired and to create a the possibility to fly across the country to have an adventure of a life time. Of course the mission was to meet Marie Kondo and witness her in action. She is pure kindness and joy. I am grateful to have found her books and to have been touched by the magic of tidying up.

In the conclusion of the show it’s a wonderful surprise to see all the clear surfaces which were once totally cluttered. I especially loved seeing Gina and her family happily playing music in the corner, connecting joyfully in a place in the house which was once inaccessible due to clutter. It’s all about making space for the people and activities that Spark Joy in your life.

If you are interested in seeing the show, it is available until May 23rd. You can see it here: http://www3.nhk.or.jp/nhkworld/en/vod/konmari/20160507.html

5 Steps to Avoiding a KonMari Rebound

April 4, 201610KonMari MethodTags: declutter, KonMari Method, life-changing magic, Marie Kondo, organize, Spark Joy, Tidying April 16

The fear of rebound is real. In both of her books , The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up and Spark Joy Marie Kondo frequently mentions how no one has ever rebounded after following her method of tidying. A “rebound” would mean going back to living in a cluttered and messy house after you have completed the method. The idea is to tidy your home by going through all the things you own by category, choosing to keep the things that “spark joy” then thanking and letting go of the rest. No one wants to be the first to fail at the method.

“Thinking of your life after KonMari is the key,” according to Ms. Mitsugu Ando, the Manager of the KonMari Consultants in Japan who recently led a private seminar in San Francisco, California. I was honored to attend the seminar and the notes I took will help you stay on track with your tidying.

Follow these steps in order and you will be forever safe from having a KonMari rebound.

1. Imagine your Ideal Home and Life

The first and most important step. Think about the life you want. What does it look like? What does it feel like? How are you spending your time? To answer these questions write down your objective and goals, or create a board on Pinterest, or create a vision board from images cut from magazines pasted on a poster board. However you choose to express yourself, this activity will serve as your guide post to keep you motivated to complete the KonMari Method in your home.

2. Focus on the Positive

One of the ways the KonMari Method stands out from the other methods of decluttering is that it is all about focusing on what you want to keep in your life. Focusing on what brings you joy and surrounding yourself in these joyful belongings will increase your joy.

3. Decide your “Click Point”

The KonMari Method is not minimalism. There is no set number of things you should keep. As you go through your things by category, ask yourself, “how much is enough?” You decide for yourself what is the right amount of things for you.

4. Designate a Home for Each Thing

Once you have gone through all your belongings and kept the joyful things, it’s storage time. Make sure each thing has a home. Some basics of storing are the magical folding method for cloth/soft things, vertical placement, storing like with like and dividing storage into squares by using boxes.

5. Return Things to their Homes

After you use something, put it back where you got it from. Simple enough, right?

Image: KonMari Media Inc.

Five simple steps that will lead to a forever tidy home. Nothing to be afraid of friends. My favorite lesson from the seminar is to forget all the “rules” of the method and tune into your inner guide. It’s all about finding what “sparks joy” for you. So you be the judge about these five steps. Joy or No Joy?

Category: KonMari Method